Mrs. Sen is a distant cousin of my mother’s sister in laws second brother’s third wife( first two are happily married not to each other). My mom had been talking about her since my last birth , and today I had the privilege of visiting her.
Last month she was freshly imported from her son from CANADA.The door was opened by a lady who seemed a hybrid between Nirupa Roy and Mumtaz( strictly going by how much she pouted and quivered her lips). Mrs. Sen came across as the Jawanipur express derailed at the last compartment, considering the amount of pancake she slapped across her face. Otherwise she looked just little worse than OK . The disaster struck when my mom started her usual topic of daughter bashing( she prefers to use acid and phenyl instead of regular soap in me-bashing). Tanataraaa tara taram---Mrs. Laboni Sen was in her best spirits( only Rum no breezers ).
At her dramatic best she started as to how nobody could beat her in her frustration and sadness. Wow, not even my mom( even after having a daughter like me!!). There she was sitting in the middle of the sofa , I could see the acid rising from inside( a SEN-sation feeling in Bengalis ombol—acid reflux ) as she narrowed her already extinct eyebrows and started her west side story. The blabbering started , as to how these firang culture are spoiling the holy soil in kal Yug( what an awesome movie man).Her son it seems had started dating a firang ( there goes my dream of marrying a NRI) and actually took had the audacity to go out for a date without asking his only ma( blasphemy !) . My mother was about to open her mouth , when Mrs. Sen gave us the my-thighs-a-better-actress-than-me Shipa Shetty look ,and started her rant. With a passionate shake of his head, she looked to the right and then to the left, rapidly, in a way that would make the Nana Patekar’s character in Parinda look positively tranquil.
As a matter of fact, Mrs. Sen squeezes in more drama and chills in these few minutes than Katrina Kaif in Tees Maar Khan! In her long list of grudges from the lack of availability of fresh water fish (pukurer mach )in CANADA, to the policy of the Indian Government for not doing anything about the brain drain, unfair treatment of Bisawajit( father of posenjit aka Prasenjit of Bengal) by the Bollywood , SUCHITRA SEN being not given Life time achievement award by the Oscars, the immigration policy of CANADIAN Governement( Malotir Ma not being able to make it to CANADA Mrs. Sen had to wash her dishes everyday !&%* sic sic ).
Ekta Kapoor would have dumped Vidya Balan only if she was around. Mrs Sen was entertainment cube at her best when suddenly my mother made the second mistake of her life(first being giving birth to –u got it right?). She had the audacity to disagree with her on her take on Suchitra Sen!!! All hell bent loose, Laboni Mashi , turned from being Nirupa roy to Lalita Pawar. I would see my dream of devouring Gajar ka Halwa and alu ke parathe being turned into nightmare. As Laboni Mashi, suddenly offered us water with some toblerone and phoren chocolates!!!. It seems Malotir ma had still not got over the trauma over immigration laws and called it quits!!!!!! Well I started devouring , like a starved Emraan Hashmi being offered to play the lead in Jism bane Murder –er.The result is that I am still suffering from such complex motion that sometimes I forget to even flush(its that frequent !!!). One of the chocolates I carried back home , I tried checking the price tag( feeling elated of having taken one for my bherry bherry close fraand), among many things I saw a little tag. Made in China!!! Either this is Chinalization or Khiddipore Fancy Marketization, I know not!!!!
Hi Madhu,
ReplyDeletesorry for calling you by this name as you don't know me, i was browsing soumitra's profile and saw your blog link, being curious i took the liberty of reading your blog, well to be honest with you i live in Canada or as the Punjabis say Caneda... well the essence was good and sort of liked it, but as far as your finding of the fact made in china in concerned.. let me assure you here in Canada, even in big brands stores and also to be more precise in UK where i spent a considerable time of my life, you will find many a expensive to cheap goods which has a tag or a print of made in china, or taiwan or even bangladesh, coz these big companies like toblerone and others they in order to minimise their overhead costs often outsource such production as well. so dont freak out, rather chill... china is slowly taking over a lot of things and places...... just wait till they invade us like the good old brits did ages back. sorry again for posting comment... if you want you can surely delete it. so just chill and let many women like Mrs Sen keep ranting whatever they want to .... times are changing and it will change..... good luck.